Dare I say.

But I feel my spark returning. I have had little flashes of it before but was still doubtful of it from day to day. My confidence is something that plays a major part in how I feel when out doing sports - and if I feel on top of it emotionally I feel like I can conquer the world. And I can feel that spark getting bigger and bigger again - much to my delight.

On my last post I do believe I mentioned that I was going to tackle Cobbitty. Well I am proud to say that I did. And yes it hurt but probably not as much as I had played it out in my head during the whole week. For all you out in Blog land who have not seen or ridden Cobbitty - it's the kind of ride that many of our Triathlete's here in our club use as a good strength ride and I guess as part of their regular training ride for Ironman training. It's a good mix of flats and hills - a real good test of how your training is going from week to week. However, for me it has always scared me - but not now. It's mine yet again.

And not only did I do Cobbitty but I also tacked on Greendale as well as having ridden in to meet everyone - so I am also happy to say that I completed my longest ride in one outing to date.

129km.

And I was stoked. I also had a sore right bottom cheek thanks to forgetting to use my Chamois Butt'r and I now have a  sore about 4cm's in length where the chamois was rubbing - but it was a small price to pay for a HUGE accomplishment for me. Mind you I wasn't saying that as I ran around the shower screeching - I know visuals are too much - SORRY. But it wasn't just me who accomplished something on that day. We had other first time Cobbitty riders - who totally smashed it - Matt, Jane and Garth. They did AWESOME.

So how do I feel 2 day's post ride? Great. Legs feel fine just a little heavy but I am happy with my recovery. Feeling good about how I am progressing for this ride to Melbourne. And really I know that if I feel a bit/alot smashed then I will have all my friends helping me feel strong and better. 

I went and saw the GP today about a few things I am feeling - so needing to have blood work done on Monday as it seems my medication could be reacting with sunlight. And if that's the case I need to be covering up when riding - or ride when it's dark or early hours of the morning when the sun is at it's weakest. I break out in a lacy splotchy type rash all over my arms and legs - that which is exposed to sunlight and I also feel like I am burning up. So he just wants to make sure it is not affecting anything else. Anyway - enough of me.

Anyway, my friend Mike who is owner of the wonderful Blog - The Shoes Made Me Do It - is holding a wonderful giveaway. Ever heard of Knuckle Lights? I hadn't till I read his blog. Jump on his blog and post a comment. Entry is open to US resident's only so make sure all my friends in the States get onto this ASAP as entry is closing on Feb 1st 5am your time. He is an early riser so make sure you don't miss out.

I also wanted to share my new do. I am so excited about it, I feel like a new woman. What do you think?

So how is everyone going?

Wake up.

Yeah you heard me. It's time to pull back those covers, have a real good stretch and step out of your comfort zone. It's time to crawl out of your skin and feel uncomfortable.

WHY?

Because having a good crack at YOUR life means at times pushing yourself and feeling uncomfortable. Of course I don't mean being silly and doing things that would endanger you, but I do mean finding something that you are passionate about and going for it. Dive in head first and give it all you got. Coming out the other end of something which you first thought impossible it probably one of the most gratifying feelings in this universe. and doing it with people whom you love and trust just makes it all the better.

Getting back into cycling has been a real Godsend to me. Actually getting back out there in every sense of the word has been just what I needed. I have gradually been increasing my distances and time spent in the saddle and incorporating small amounts of swimming as recovery but not alot. When the kids head back to school I will be able to squeeze a bit more in. The middle of the days will be free for me to do more.

I have to do Cobbitty again though. I need to get the monkey off my back. That ride always plays mind games with me. It is one of the things that has me - and always has - scared. I have tried to break it down as why that route worries me and I think it's because I struggle so much with it and it never ever feels easier. The pain just plays mind games with me. I constantly talk to myself the whole way through that ride - PUSH PUSH, YOU CAN DO IT, GET OUT OF THE SADDLE, SIT BACK DOWN, GET BACK UP AGAIN, DON'T GIVE UP. My God, it's like having 10 people inside my head.

But I won't let it win. I will do Cobbitty this Sunday. Nice and slow - very slow to be precise but atleast it will get done. So if you happen to be out and about and see a de-shevelled shell of a human talking to themselves on the side of the road - tell me to get a move on......lol

I will be feeling uncomfortable.

But having a crack at it.

Happy New Year.

Can't believe 2011 has already gone and we are into the New Year. Time sure does fly when your having fun. What an EPIC 2011. So many things to be thankful for - YES even those things that have tested us to within an inch of our very lives we should be grateful for having come out the other end a much stronger and resilient individual. I have learnt things about myself  - some of which created a rocky path to overcome, however in doing so I realised that no matter how low you can get or feel that inner voice of hope and freedom will always get you back to the top - you just have to listen and give of yourself 100% and let the journey BE.

I know that I am capable of many things - great things, and for that I am PROUD. I always knew I was a lucky individual with my friends and family but everyday I try to make them aware of just how much. And just in cased you missed it - YOU GUYS ROCK. 

And so with a new year upon me it is time to make some new goals. Create some new dreams, make some new paths and conquer some old fears. This year - 2012 - will be one to be reckoned with. I am sure of it. Lets see, where to begin.

• Cycle to Melbourne with the Cycling Cerebellums - HUGE.
• Yeppoon 70.3 - IT'S MINE.
• Cole Classic - CAN'T WAIT
• Ocean swimming - YES PLEASE. - no hesitation, this is a MUST.
• Feel fit again.
• Watch this space - to be continued I'm sure.

I'm excited. Now let's get some training started.