Monday, June 6, 2011

It couldn't possibly be.

Could it? This late in the game? Surely not! But not sure what else it could be. Could this post race slump happen so many weeks after an event? As it has never happened to me before after a swim event it has me quite stumped. For the last 3 weeks it has been and on again off again saga - one minute I feel okay and on top of the world and then the next I feel sad, tired and lacking of enthusiasm.

This has me very worried considering that as of next week I start my training again for Yeppoon. When I think back to how I was feeling for Port training - enthused, ecstatic, bubbling with excitement - this is NOT how I am feeling at the moment. Right at this very moment I feel - NOTHING. Actually, I lie - I feel overwhelmed. Engulfed would probably be a more fitting word.

This feeling seems to be having negative side effects on my emotional well being. I am normally a happy, cheery person who can tackle a million and one things and still come out on top, and somehow at the moment I feel like everything is coming on top of me. And it's probably not - actually if I was to look at it with non-judgemental eyes, it really isn't but it is the feeling of treading water that I don't like.

I like waking up and knowing that I am on top of everything and that I am in control. However, when I wake up feeling overwhelmed before the day has even started - that is not a good thing in my books. I think I need to cut me some slack and know that it's okay to not feel 100% all the time - day in and day out.

I was even working on a little project which I was excited about and have decided to not go ahead with it at the moment as it would just be something else to think about, and if I couldn't give that 100% the way I do everything else then I would feel disappointed. So, it is on hold. Till I am thinking clearer and back to being Barbie.

But I am still left to wonder - is this a delayed POST RACE SLUMP?

Your hard work will be rewarded.

"The path to a dream is paved with sacrifices and lined with determination. And though it has many stumbling blocks along the way, and may go in more than one direction, it is travelled by belief and courage and conquered with a willingness to face challenges and take chances" Barbara Cage