Do you ever dream?
Not the kind of dream where you close your eyes and drift off into the land of nod and allow your uncontrolled brain to run wild. But the kind of dream where you are wide awake and you forcefully imagine every last minute detail of what that encounter will be like? Where if given the chance to make it come to life just as you had imagined you would jump at the chance in a heartbeat?
For the last however many weeks since my injury I have been dreaming. Dreaming with EYES WIDE OPEN for that moment where I would be able to walk those first cautiously tentative steps towards my dream again. I have yearned to be a part of a community again which has given me so much.
So when Steve my physio said that I could do a walk, let me tell you - I think I gave him the biggest cuddle ever. It really was like all my Christmas' had come at once. Ive been waiting for those words for ages. And it almost felt as though those words would never come. But here they are!!!! I am able to walk.
So yesterday - I took the opportunity whilst the sun was shining to go for my walk. The sun shone about as brightly as my smile. And if I had of been on my own during this walk I still think I would have smiled as brightly albeit it would have looked slightly weird. But instead - I went on my first glorious walk with my beautiful daughter. It couldn't have been any better if I tried. We had the best time, a great mother/daughter bonding session. And there was a little competitiveness that came out in us both with some unsuspecting male walkers. It was so funny - our goal was to stay ahead of them for the entire walk - however, right at the very end they took a short cut and beat us to the finish line. Somehow I think they may have known we were trying to beat them or MAYBE they were trying to beat us. Either way, a little healthy competition never hurt anyone :) I might just clarify here though that it wasn't a fast walk either. And this morning I feel great.
The only feelings I have this morning reminding me that I walked yesterday are tight back muscles and a blister on the back of my right foot. And you know what? Im happy that I have that tiny blister. It means that I have done something that required a little effort :) and whilst it was the best walk ever, I was slightly out of my comfort zone and I didn't realise how unfit I had become. Seems like only yesterday I was able to run a full 21km and still do a full days worth of other stuff around it all.
That day will come again. I know it.
Till then I will embrace this journey with both hands and look forward to my next walk.