Friday, May 14, 2010

Not liking this Rollercoaster

I always valued the importance of my health, being sick for almost a year makes you yearn for TOTAL health like nothing else. The saying "You don't know what you've got till it's gone" takes on a whole new meaning. I used to wake up just wishing for no pain and if I had a mediocre day, then I was on Cloud 9.

Since then my meaning of health and well being has taken on a totally new concept, and when a health scare smacks me in the face - I wish, no pray, beg and plead for things to be okay. I have too many things to attend to for anything to get in the way. I almost feel cheated of my right to be healthy when an ailment comes knocking. God only knows how hard I have worked over this past year at getting my health back for anything to go wrong. So when my preliminary results came back of a bulging meniscus in my left knee, to say I was a "blubbering idiot" was an understatement. All my dreams of the 70.3 went flashing before my eyes straight down the gurgler. I really need to learn to get my emotions under control. What good is having a total meltdown? The outcome would still be the same. I guess it's easier said than done.

The 24hr wait for the conclusive results was hell. I went from feeling sorry for myself, to having the total "you know whats", to almost a sense of grief, loss. Thank goodness it was only 24hrs, not sure if hubby and the kids would have coped any longer. The conclusive results did not make one single mention of the bulging meniscus - zip, niet, nada - WOOHOO. The only thing they did mention was calcification of the quadricep tendon. No biggie. That wont stop me from getting running in. But I will behave till Monday till I see the physiotherapist.

Since Tuesday I do believe I may have aged 10 years with the worry. I know this because my son Kurtis found my first ever "Grey Hair". Can you believe it, bugger I can't. It is right there on my left temple, so everytime I stare into the mirror there the little critter is. I am almost tempted to rip it out but as my son Kurt so likes to remind me if I do many more will take it's place. So guess what I am doing this weekend - you guessed it - a nice deep mahogany colour should suit me just fine. What do you think?

4 comments:

  1. Good news on the prelim results. I will remain hopeful for you. I made a hobby out of dealing with health scares and issues in 2008. I know how you feel. Keep it positive, keep it loose.

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  2. Thanks heaps Patrick. I will definately work on staying positive. It just gets disheartening at times.

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  3. I feel you. Last year I fell off my bike and suffered a separated shoulder. When the orthopedic told me I was not going to be swimming for months, I thought I was going to cry.I STILL swam—breaststroke, (with one arm across my body.) The doc said if I could withstand the pain, she did not see any reason why I couldn't run. I wasn't fast, and it messed up my gait temporarily, but I got through it. You'll survive this setback. Stay positive. Then.. go out there and kick some ass!

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  4. Mark: Thankyou so much for those encouraging words. You are a very brave man for running with a separated shoulder, but it goes to show you what grit and determination will get you. I am very much looking forward to seeing the physiotherapist tomorrow and seeing what they have to say and do for me.

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I am so happy you have stopped by. You have made my day.

Your hard work will be rewarded.

"The path to a dream is paved with sacrifices and lined with determination. And though it has many stumbling blocks along the way, and may go in more than one direction, it is travelled by belief and courage and conquered with a willingness to face challenges and take chances" Barbara Cage