Perfectly perfect

Well, since my last post alot has happened. Some worth mentioning - and some not. Everything I believe has happened for a reason - I am a firm believer in positivity breeding exuberant amounts of opportunities. AND that's exactly what has happened.

For those of you who know me well, you will know how hard it has been for me this last year. I am not ashamed of what I have had to work through. Living and overcoming anxiety and depression has been quite a battle. It is something that has made me question myself to the very core of my being, yet even though it has challenged me far more than anything else in my life - I BELIEVE I am coming out the other end a much stronger and resilient individual. I look at things a heck of a lot differently and understand that you are only given this one life - and why wouldn't you want to take every opportunity that comes your way and make the most of it, regardless of the judgements that some may wish to impose on you. After all, this is NOT something we wish on ourselves - Lord only knows this is not something we would wish on our worst enemy. And so because of the things I have learnt through this testing time, I have applied them to my daily life.

Anyway enough of that.

Life is amazing at the moment. With only 5 weeks to go till Yeppoon 70.3, although I don't feel anywhere near as fit as this time last year - I feel prepared to tackle the swim and kick it's arse (pardon the expression). After all, coming back to Yeppoon was all about settling the score with the ocean. ANd whilst this race will be very slow - I couldn't care less. I just want to finsih the swim. And I know I will - thanks to BondiFit's Spot and Sarah. You guys have made me so unafraid of the ocean and for that I am forever grateful. I love the fact that I don't get sea sick and I love the fact that I can open my eyes and see what is happening underneath the waves. I have you guys to thanks for that. If any of you guys reading this are looking for great Open Water mentors - then BondiFit is for you.

I have also tackled my first 10km run since last year. I entered the SunCorp Sydney Harbour 10km race and might I add - I think I did pretty well. Actually I am stoked with my time considering I was hoping to walk/run it in about 75mins. Are you ready to hear my time?

55:37.

Thats about a 5:30 pace per km. How awesome is that? I remember when I first started running I was happing to be doing a 6:30 pace - and I think I may have even said to my best friend Susan that I was quite content to keep that pace. But now to say that, after a year my body has recognised a 5:30 pace as being something it is capable of starting back at - is really quite exciting to see what the future holds in terms of my running.

It was such an amazing run too. So beautiful and flat - just the way I like it. And my new Sir Lady Isaac's felt great to run in too. They make me fall into my run and consequently my pace improves too. So much so that I was pacing a young chap for the majority of the run.

My best friend Susan also did AMAZINGLY. She smashed her first 10km run in a whopping 49mins and is well on the way to reaching her goal of the accomplishing the City to Surf. You have this in the bag missy.

But nothing makes me excited as my new job - Media and PR for TriShave Australia. Want to know more about TriShave? Then click here. This product is unlike anything else on the market. It is something I have used for over 2yrs since my first TriShave Womens Triathlon event and have loved it ever since. Being out in the sun for training I have realised how important it is to take good care of your skin. And what I was looking for I found in TriShave. I found a great moisturiser and sunscreen in one without the greasiness and harshness that came with other SPF products. I have quite sensitive skin and TriShave ticked that box too. So why would I have turned away from such a fantastic product. So when I was asked by Larisa if I wanted to work for her - it seemed like the perfect fit and my answer of YES came naturally. 

I am so excited. TriShave rocks. Check out the website and check out where you can purchase it from. You won't look back - I promise you that. Every Australian should have this product in their bathroom. And if you don't - WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?

Moving along.

There comes a point when you just have to put yourself out there and take a chance on yourself and see how  you respond. Well that is what I have been doing and yesterday's run proved that I still have a little "get up and go" left in the old engine. 

So I am still at the walk/run phase but I almost doubled my distance by doing a lap around the river. Clair and I even ran the dirt track and I wasn't even that puffed. Mind you the first 1km we both ran we both took off like a bull at a gate and then I had to slow it down to a more respectable 6min/km pace. Much much better. But my body this morning is feeling great. Apart from the usual heaviness - there is no pain anywhere and I feel as happy as a kid in a candy shop.

And because I am still at the beginning phase I decided now would be a good time to wean myself into a brand new spanking pair of Newtons - Lady Isaac's. Check out how pretty they are.

I'm sure they won't stay this clean for too long.

So, as I look back at my first week of Yeppoon training - I think I am doing pretty good. My stomach is holding up really well and there is absolutely no pain to speak of, other than muscular aches. I am stoked. Looks like another perfect day out there - so it's off to ride my bike again with the Wednesday morning group. I have missed them so much. 

Check

Things are looking good for me at the moment and I really couldn't be happier. My body, although sore and letting me know it is back into training is thriving on doing some form of activity everyday. 

My bike ride on Sunday was awesome. I loved every minute of it and think I was smiling from ear to ear. The freedom you feel on the bike is unlike anything else. I can really only compare it to the freedom I feel in the water - the tranquility just gives me a really good feeling. That is until I get to a hill and then my legs quickly remind me how inept I am at them, and my puffing and panting can be heard Im sure from kilometres away. 

"Bubba" the Cannondale was an absolute gem. Now Im not sure if it was because I had fresh legs or the fact that he is just brand spanking new gears, new chain, being a TT bike or what - but I felt faster. Im sure it was in my head and I was just feeling all giddy but it is such a smooth ride. Changing gears takes a bit of getting used to. I was constantly tapping in my brakes to change my gears and then would have a little chuckle to myself - GET IT RIGHT BARB.

When I got home after a short 35km ride I was on Cloud 9. The weather was just perfect. Not a cloud in the sky and great company. What more could I have asked for. I really feel like I am making my way back. I have missed it so so much. Here is another shameless self portrait - just in case you have forgotten what I look like.

Then yesterday I went for my first swim post surgery. I was really excited albeit tentative to get in the water. I thought I may have a bit of an issue and I did. Nothing big but I had trouble getting the full length of my stroke in. It seems my stomach muscles are a bit tight and I could feel it everytime I would take a stroke with my right arm. It wasn't painful, just tight and my abdomen would fatigue and then my core would sag and I didnt feel like I was sitting up high in the water.

I asked Yas if I could pop my flippers on and do the set with them on. It did made it much easier to do the session and i was happy to do 2.7km for my first swim back. Now a day later I have no pain in my abdomen but my pecs, lats, tri's and delt's are saying - "Welcome back to the pool Barb". 

I have been religiously doing my strength and conditioning sessions from Sparta and have altered the training program from last years Yeppoon program from TopNotch to suit where I am at. So with everything at my fingertips, I should make it to Yeppoon and finish feeling really proud of all my effort. My aim is not to be back to how I was this time last year, but rather accomplish something I had my sight's set on close to 12 months ago and say to myself at the end - YOU DID IT BARB. 

Now let's bring on another run.

Green light

So I have been given the green "Go ahead" light from the surgeon, much to my relief. I had been hanging real bad to be able to train again. Well really, not even to train but to just get out and be a part of it. Something I have missed terribly. However, that being said YES I do have to start training as the Yeppoon 70.3 is just around the corner and I MUST finish this. It is something I have my sights set on and I WILL finish it - regardless of the time.

I did my first run back this last Thursday and although small - 3.5km (a mix of walk and run) it was still positive. My abdomen did not hurt one bit and I had to slow myself down. A 5:40 pace is not something I was expecting after almost 1yr of no running. So I pulled the reigns tight and ran at a pace close to a walk and finished it with a smile on my dial that was priceless. 

That night I rejoined Sparta's Strength and Conditioning Class. I have asked Jen to help me get my Core and body as strong as possible in the time we have for Yeppoon. So not only will I be attending my regular Thursday night class I am now doing a weekly programme as well. Combine this with my programme that I am using from TopNotch I think I am giving myself every opportunity to succeed in finishing the 70.3 at Yeppoon in 8 weeks time. Yeah, I know I am cutting it fine but I HAVE to do this race. I cannot and WILL not let it win again. 

So the following morning I woke up slightly sore (not in my belly) but my legs. I think they were in complete shock with what I had put them through the day before and it wasn't even anything really big. But I guess starting from zero has it's draw backs. The advantage is that this has not deterred me or frightened me in the least bit and I am hanging to start training again. Bring on Monday I say. 

Well actually BRING ON tomorrow. I get on my bike and I could not be happier. Not only because it has been ages but also because for the last 4 weeks I have been staring at my baby BUBBA the Cannondale longing for the day that I can ride it - and here it is. Tomorrow, I shall take him out and the 2 of us shall start getting acquainted with one another. I can't wait. how exciting. Are you excited? I am!!!!!

Stay tuned as I let you know how I go on my first ride back POST OP. Should be interesting. Fingers crossed the belly agrees. It should.

Leaps and bounds

I am feeling FANTASTIC. Really, truly I am. I could very much head out the door on a slow jog for a few (well maybe 2) kilometres and know that it wouldn't hurt. It is such a good feeling to know that the healing process is well and truly under way and that I can now feel really positive about moving forward. And I know that I still have to take it easy, but I must admit I have to remind myself quite regularly that I have had surgery some 15 days ago. 

It takes every bit of self restraint to not pick up the laundry basket full of clothes to take out to the clothes line, or vacuum the carpet. And whilst I would normally beg and plead to have help when I am able to do it, now that I cannot - I want to do it all myself. And so whilst I feel frustrated about "said situation" - I shall walk. Walk, and walk and walk like Forrest Gump. So much so I have this week walked 17km. And it has made me very happy indeed.

When I am exercising I am ALIVE. It's true what they say about exercise and endorphins " Endorphins are the body’s natural feel good chemicals, and when they are released through exercise, your mood is boosted naturally" - Natural Therapies Pages. After every walk - actually pretty soon after starting I feel fantastic. I soon forget about the fact that at this moment I am limited in what I can do and start focusing on the things that I can do. And I can WALK, and pretty fast too I might add. I put my headphones on and I am off, nothing is holding me back.

So still having this weekend ahead of me, I am looking forward to a couple more walks should the weather hold up. Looks like we have a few rain clouds starting to brew. And if the heavy rain decides to start then I guess I am starting a new form of the "Clothesline Diet" - the "Verandah Diet". Please Mother Nature - save me from getting dizzy.

Fingers crossed I get the all clear next Friday at the Doc's. 

Fingers crossed everyone.

Small steps

Most often the greatest victories come from those with which you have had to start with the smallest steps. I think I am getting pretty good at starting from scratch - and don't seem to be too phased by this fact. Yes, I am bored out of my brain for the time being, however I know that in a very short time this feeling shall pass and I will be right in the thick of training trying to get as prepared as I will be for Yeppoon. 

Starting from the 11th of June I will have precisely 9 weeks to get myself - with the help of last years Yeppoon program from TopNotch which I will have to tweak due to the circumstances I find myself in and Jen's strength and conditioning program from Sparta-PT. I think I would really struggle if I didn't have the help from both.

I hope I can do them both proud when I finally make it and smash Yeppoon 70.3 for good.

It is now 11 days post-op and I have now done 2 walks. My second walk was 3km and  felt great. I'm not nearly as swollen - although there is still a little bit of tenderness and a slight bit of bruising but nothing compared to a few days ago. I am really happy with how the recovery is progressing and if I continue at this rate then I should be good to go when I see the surgeon for my post-op check up on the 8th June.That will make it 3 weeks.

I am hanging to get out on my new Cannondale SLICE which I have named "Bubba". Not sure why that name but the name just seems to fit. So I am sticking with it. So am looking forward to the week of 11th of June where Bubba and I can spend some quality time together. Shhhhh, don't tell Stephen.

But for now I shall be content with adding a few more walks to my repetoire. The funny thing is I am starting to think distances again. For instance, if I walk 3km's a day for 7 days then I have reached my 21km and I know it's not the same but for me I have still will done the 21km. Then I will just need to turn that into a slow run walk initially which I know I can do in 9 weeks. No probs. I will have this sorted even though at this stage it still sounds so elusive.

And so the journey begins.

Well continues really. But it almost feels as though I am going to have to start from scratch again. The hernia that I keep referring to as the "little thing" is actually a bit of a big thing it turns out. I somehow thought (and silly me because Im a nurse) that I would bounce back from this like some spring chicken - WRONG. And yes, I know it has only been 8 days and I am wanting miracles to happen, but realistically - this is going to take me a bit to bounce back from.

It's amazing really how quickly your abdominals decide to give up on you the moment you stop using them. Which is why if you have functional abdominal muscles you should treat them with a healthy respect. They do so much for you and don't ask for anything in return really. Since my abdominal muscles have become impaired my back has decided to start aching again. I guess its had to start working hard again to support my torso in the upright position. All I want to do is crack it in the backwards fashion and could easily but am scared I will stretch and hurt my stomach. Argghhhh, annoying. But I should stop complaining because this surgery was needed and I asked for it to be done. So here's to me stopping the complaining - NOW.

Complaining is the absolute worst possible thing you could

do for your health or your wealth.

The worst.

~ T. Harv Eker ~

Now to the BIG news. Well for me its HUGE and I am STOKED. And I can't wait to get started on what is to be the biggest thing I have embarked on since....... well...... 2010 when I decided that Triathlons were going to be what would help me get myself back. I have signed up for - drum rollllllllllllllll

IMOZ 2013

It just doesn't seem to get old saying it. I have just signed up for an IRONMAN. How damn awesome is that. And I know I could possibly say things which will be to the contrary when I am in the thick of training, but for I will relish in the fact that in less than 365 days - I will be a part of those people who cross that line being called an IRONMAN. And I can't wait. Mind you, I think the sign up process was stressful enough.

I had sweaty, shakey hands, heart palps, dry mouth, all signs of adrenal overload. My adrenalin levels were red lining.I couldn't believe how many times I re-typed my name on the sign up page and it kept kicking me out. And I think, actually I know I let a few expletives slip. But I was frantic. Funny thing is, I was going by last years signup which sold out in 5 mins flat, so I thought the same would happen this year. It is now - close to 72hrs post opening of sign-up, only 92% full. So I could have stressed less. Oh well, Im IN. God bless all my friends who were frantically trying to get me on too. And a HUGE thankyou to Ruth for getting me signed up. You are a TREASURE.

So I sit here now, scratching my itchy healing buddha belly and all I want is to swim, bike and run. And I know the time will come. But for now I must be content with short walks. And by short I mean short - 800m. Easy does it tiger.